This morning, Bella wants to know, "What's that thing called so you can stand up and pee?" She mimes standing there with an imaginary something in her hands, spraying imaginary pee everywhere in a really cool way. Explaining, "See, make it go that way. Make it go over there. Make it go over here."
I smile with a confident cheerfulness I do not feel, "A penis."
She nods sagely, "A penis. Why don't I got one?"
I look around for her Dad but of course at mind-cringing moments like these, he is nowhere to be found. "Because you're a girl and only boys have a penis."
She is not happy. "What do I got then?"
More bright cheer because Im just soooo happy to be having this unexpected anatomical conversation with a five year old this morning. "You have something really special called a vagina. And a vulva! And you've got a cli...ummm...yeah, and lots of other really great things."
She's still frowning. "But I can't stand up and pee like this with a vagina."
....My blog has a new address. Please join me there for the rest of this scintillating post on Bella and penis-envy. http://laniwendtyoung.wordpress.com/2013/04/04/i-want-a-penis/
I know how you feel....had this convo with my 4 year old
ReplyDeleteNever a dull moment I tell ya! You can file this one under "kids say the darnest things": Went to the GB bakery with baby girl and while I was picking out the bread, I hear....
Ry: Mommy I wan pinuh!
Me: What?
Ry: I wanna eat pinuh!
Me: What's a pinuh?
Ry: This one...pinuh...(points to the DONUTS)
Me: Oh....no baby girl those are no good...they're too sweet. How about a pizza?
Ry: Ummm...okay.
After receiving the pizza from the lady....
Ry: Mommy....you wanna eat "pinuhs"?
Me: WHAT DID YOU SAY?
Ry: you wanna eat "PINUHS"?
I looked up to a awestruck lady standing next to us staring at us in disbelief.....
Me: (in my desperate loud voice)....Ohhhh DONUTS....no baby Mommy don't want DONUTS!
Ry: Yeah...no good the PINUHS yeah?
Me: (that's it let's get out of here.......NOW!!!!!!)
....will be practicing our phonics and enunciation......EVERYDAY......DAILY.....FOREVER!!!!!!